Pondering on people

The only reason some people are alive is because it is against the law to kill them.

On Key West North here in the heart of the Redneck Rivera, Santa Rosa Island is full of them. Last week I was at a new islander's house. He and his wife had moved from "up Nawth" and were meeting new people! The next door neighbor's dog was yapping very loud and it had been going on for hours. When he couldn't take it anymore, he rushed downstairs and came back a few minutes later. I could still hear the dog barking like it was going to die any second. I asked him what he had done, the dog was still making life miserable for all of us. He said, "I went down and put the dog in our backyard, let's see how they like it for a while!" He votes just like you and me. His vote will count just as much, but he should be put to sleep and taken out of the gene pool.

Then there is sometimes wisdom beyond the humor. I was at Flounder's last week, sitting outside enjoying the sun deck and some nachos. An old married couple was sitting at the table next to us. You could tell they had been married for some time, as she was doing all the talking and he was just "Yes Dearing," the hell out of her. She was starring at a man at a nearby table that was obviously in a drunken stupor, but was having fun with everyone and his waitress didn't seem to mind. The husband asked her, "Why are you staring at that man?" She said, "He's my first husband, you never met him, he comes to the island every now and then and he's been drinking like that ever since I left him 20 two years ago!" "That's remarkable", the old man replied, "I wouldn't think a that anyone could celebrate anything for that long a period of time!" She yelped, got up, called a taxi and left him alone at the table. I laughed out loud for five minutes, bought him a drink and wondered if he was soon to be an ex-husband as well, but I couldn't let a line like that go unrecognized! A man has to speak his mind sometimes just to keep his sanity!

Then there is the wife comeback that has to rank in the top five of all time. When 'Lil Bubba was on the way, Plaintiff talked me into going to a pre-birth class with her. It was a class for couples that already had at least one child. The instructor raised the issue of breaking the news to the older child. It wasn't important to me as Bubba Junior had been asking for a "little brother" for five years and I had been doing all I could to fulfill his request. However, the leader of the class continued with, "Some parents tell the older child" "We love you so much we decided to bring another child into the family." "But think about that ladies, what if your husband came home one day and said, "Honey, I love you so much I decided to bring home another wife!" "What would you say to her?" Without hesitation, Plaintiff spoke up and said, "Do you cook?" They had to shut the class down early, one woman laughed her self into labor, one slapped her husband for laughing to hard, and I went and made reservations for dinner later than night. I ain't no fool!

If you think people are stupid or intelligent, you are right. Some of the most intelligent people I have ever met, say and do the dumbest things at times. Those are the times that seem to bring us together. Those times make us human to everyone regardless of our station in life and those times are the times that will flash before our eyes when are we are assuming room temperature on our death bed. I have found in life that whether life happens to you or you happen to life, how you handle these moments are the measure of you as a person.

I pity the person that can't laugh at themselves, nor do I want them to be around them any longer than I have to be. Just try and keep it to a minimum! That is the most you can do, trust me.

Just thought you'd like to know...