Summer camp

Well, it's summer camp time soon. The time of year when all the little rich kids get to go to Camp Wadomoney and play Boy Scout for a week. It is time for Country meets City and all the scars that come with it. I got to work at a camp as a counselor during my teen years and learned that little rich kids need their butts kicked for the first time in their lives, and this is the reason God sent them to me! I had the opportunity to set several of them on the path to a better understanding of the real world while they were in my care at "camp!"

I had to teach them not to "pick up the moving stick" and not to "lick the blade of the knife" after they put the peanut butter on the bread. I still love to watch people go into the woods and act stupid. It is Spring and the IGMO's are going outside for the first time in months. It's better than TV and twice as funny.

Here are a few things I have overheard in years past.

"I can tread water all day!" This is usually right before they go under for the third time and have to be pulled to shore by the hair of their head.

"If you don't bother it, it won't bother you!" They have never encountered a copperhead in the woods. This snake will come after you even if you are running away from it.

"I don't burn, I tan!" Little IGMO's say this right before being taken to the hospital for third degree burns.

"The current is not that strong, we can swim across!" We usually rescued them about six miles off the coast of Cuba, with the dumbest looks on their faces.

"Poison ivy?" I'm immune to it!" They say this right before their eyes slam shut and they look like someone beat them with a "scab stick".

"Let's see what is under this rotten log!" This is my favorite one. What do they expect, leprechauns dancing a jig?

"We don't need life jackets, it's just a river!" Bad mistake!

"I am a good knife thrower!" Yep, right between the ribs of his best pal.

"You don't need a can opener, use your knife!" One slip and it's time for IGMO Hospital.

"Let's play with the baby bear cub!" We usually never heard from these IGMO's again…!

"This rope swing wouldn't be here if the water was not deep enough!" Happens every time we get a neck injury!!

And my all time favorite…."Hey Bubba, hold my beer while and watch this !!"

So, have fun and enjoy our beautiful outdoors here on the Redneck Riviera, just don't be stupid and have to eat your words after any summer fun!!

Just thought you'd like to know….. Email Bubba at tbubba@tbubba.com